Time flies by again....

Well once again time has gone by so far and been a year. Thanks to my friend Kenra and her idea of starting a blog inspired me to update my own. So, here we go..

Well we are currently still in Santa Maria, CA. I am still working with the same Company and staying very busy. There definitely isn't a dull moment with my job. We always ask ourselves if and when we will become successful right? Well I feel having the amazing family I have and working for the company I work with makes me feel successful. I will always continue to strive for more but I must make sure I am enjoying life at the same time. I still believe we take life for granted and never really realize how fast things can be taken from us. I don't want to miss out on any opportunities with my family. Me and Ren are doing good..Raising three kids and being the best parents we can be is the hardest job in the world.

Nakita's update: She is about to be 15 yrs old in three (3) months..YIKES that is enough to make you feel old..Then I think about the fact she started High School last week and that really can put me over the edge LOL. She is my first born and has grown up so fast. She is a huge help around the house as always and a busy body any other time. She always stresses about making friends but that only lasts for about ten minutes...She is taking Spanish this year and very excited..So, if anyone wants to listen to her and communicate hey please call her lol. I have no clue what she is saying.

KJ's update: He is 11yrs old and going into 6th grade..As he says the top of the food chain..lol...He is a Xbox junky and would play all day long if we didn't stop him. He loves to skateboard and hang with the boys outside. This shows in the holes in his jeans and shoes....crazy kids will do anything now a days. He is a great big and little brother and loves his sisters dearly. He is still a huge sports fanatic, in fact this weekend we are taking him to a 49ers game and it will be his first NFL game and he is super excited.

Renati's update: She is now 6yrs old and starting 1st grade this year. She did such an amazing job in Kindergarten and loved going to school. She says she is excited one day and then not excited the next

. She can't wait to eat breakfast and lunch at school but then says she doesn't want to stay there all day. She can keep all of us on our toes that is for sure. I am sure she will do a great job in school this year too and not only make herself proud but her family.

We miss our sweet Renasia every day. There isn't a moment that goes by that I don't wonder and ask myself the WHY's over and over...She would be turning 3 yrs old this year and just the thought of wondering what our little angel looks like or who she would of acted like. I still wait for the day I have that one amazing dream that lets me know she is OK. Life is so hard and to add the additional things that people have to deal with..I was a firm believer we are given only as much as we can handle. I sometimes still to this date am unsure if that is true. I guess I will never really know the answers to any of my questions. But I do know that I am still truly blessed to have an amazing husband and best friend. Wonderful children who love to give me a run for my money and make life hectic. I wouldn't have it any other way though.

Well as this comes to an end. I want to remind all my friends and family back in Utah how much I miss them and I am sure I will see them for the holidays.

Wow time flies....

I didn't realize it has been almost a full year since I last posted on here. Many things have happened since then...So, here is my short run down which I am sure those that read this already know, but if not here it goes...

We are now located in Santa Maria, CA. I took a job as a SBU Manager in a call center. (short for...do it all...lol ) Kids are getting ready to start school...Kita into Jr High 8th grade (next year high school) uh oh...Kj into 5th grade, and Renati starts Kindergarten..OMG...is it real, this is the day she has been waiting for, to make friends, have a back pack, have a teacher, eat lunch, play outside, and have homework. So funny to listen to her go on and on..We have been practicing writing her names.

So, some of you might know Korbin is getting ready to start school at Allen Hancock out here in Santa Maria, CA. He is going to be playing basketball for their team, which is awesome. I am so proud of him for choosing this option and doing the right thing. He will be the first to go to college. Which makes my parents so very proud of him. This will give him the opportunity to go other places, starting out in a JC college. He has a great support system. Ren has really helped him with getting all signed up and it will be great to watch his games.

Life has handed this family so many obstacles that have been very difficult to cope with. I will say that time flies by so fast that it doesnt really feel like it's almost been two years since my angel passed away. There are days it feels like yesterday and there are days it feels like so long ago. But I know that as a family as long as we have eachother that is the most important part. We will always have trials and tribulations to go through. We have been through a parents worst nightmare.....Love the kids and family all around the world and back again.

GO Korbin

I will say I am very proud of my little bro Korbin~ His team the Cottonwood Colts just finished the year. Even though they lost the last game they did an excellent job I am sure! Atleast they dont give up!!

Now it is time for his Basketball season to start. I wish I was there to be at every game. But I know he will do fabulous as always. He will be that star he wants to be one day!

I love you little Bro Keep up the hard work

Thoughts

Not sure where I can even start with this one- As the days, and months passed I always wondered how I would feel once Renasia's BirthDate came. I woke up that morning and was still unsure how I was going to feel, I definetly felt sad- because I couldn't go and do what I do with the rest on their Bday give them a hug and kiss and be the 1st to wish them happy birthday. As my day continued I was so busy with work it was really good to be distracted but I couldn't stop thinking about when I get off I get to let balloons go with the kids, and Ren.
I had sent out an email the day before asking that everyone if they found time to let a balloon go with my Angels name and BirthDate on it and Ryan (my boss, but more of a friend) let everyone at my work know about that date- they sent me flowers which was such a surprise and set my day to make me smile. Later on in the day they took me outside, and then all came walking behind me with a pink balloon when I turned my head and saw it that was the 1st time I had cried that day. Wow it hit me hard- it was sad but also because it showed that people really do care. The hardest part I have had with this relocation for our family is adjusting since our entire family is back in Utah- But to have people that I am working with that haven't known me that long show they care just made my day.

When I got home me and the kids went and picked out our balloons of course we didnt follow the same guidelines I gave everyone else :) We got some Mylar balloons with sayings on them- But once Dad got off work we all went outside and let them go at the same time! It defiently is very hard when you think of what you are doing this for. As the night went on I started receiving numerous text messages, and pictures on facebook of balloons that everyone was letting go. Nothing makes me more happy when I see that everyone will take the time to support my sweet Angel-

I always thought this day would be the worst- I am not sure I think January will hit me harder. But I try to remind myself she is in such a better place than any of us. She is probably just the beautiful girl she was here. I do always have the what if's....

What would she look right now?
What if she was still here would she have dimples?
Would she be walking? Talking?

Its so hard to not think that. I think that will always be that way. As a mother its very hard to try to not always be paranoid of what happens next. I will say that I hope 2010 brings our family something positive. We have been through so much and we still have stuck it out. Everyone was always concerned about how me and Ren would turn out- But we back eachother up constantly and we are on eachothers side all the time. When I am down he helps me up, when he is down I help him up. When the kids are down we BOTH help them up. We have united as a family not only by Renasia's passing but by moving and spending alot more time with eachother and not taking life for granted. We know that tomorrow is never promised and we have to spend as much time with eachoter as we can.

Not only with her passing but watching what my friend Ryan is going through and things with his family just puts life in a different perspective. You can be the strongest person and you just never know what tomorrow will bring you.

Well again Thank you EVERYONE for all the phone calls, emails, texts, and pictures I appreciate it a ton! You are all my support system when needed. Just know I can do the same for you if ever needed.

Take care we love yall.

Halloween 2009

Hey Yall,

So for Halloween this year was definetly different. Me, Ren, and the girls went to Santa Barbara and spent the day downtown on their strip. Hung out with Alyse and Kennedy for most of the day at their Job. Walked down to the pier (wow that was far) it was really nice down there. We ate on the pier and basically did some sight seeing.

The girls went trick or treating with Alysse and Kennedy and had fun. KJ was in Utah and went trick or treating with Jenean, Moana, and all the kids.Me and Ren hung out on the Strip while they were trick or treating and defiently experienced things different than in Utah. They basically have it set up like Mardi Gra down there and they go all out. Everyone dresses up and walks up and down the strip, goes into clubs, bars and just has tons of fun. If you go to facebook page you will see some pictures soon.

We hope everyone had a safe & Happy Halloween!!

Moving & Many Changes

Well lets catch everyone up to speed.

We have relocated to Santa Maria, CA. Which most of you know for a job position I was offered. Which I am very happy I was given this opportunity, I couldn't pass up the opportunity to try new things, enjoy new areas, and also give the children a change in life to experience things they probably wouldn't of normally done.

We are settled into a nice home that is in a good area. We love the area, people, and especially the fact that we are 15 min from A BEACH. Yes I said it. I know everyone from Utah is thinking hmmm " like Great Salt Lake?" NO WAY!! This is a beach that when you stand outside you feel so free and hearing the waves is very enjoyable. It definetly is a bonus. We do have quite a few bonus things that came with the move. The weather is fabulous. It is definetly the best weather for Ren to be in with his MS. Which was a HUGE plus for me to make this move.

Kita is settled into her school called Fessler Middle School. She likes it, of course she has made many friends. Even though she was so worried she wouldn't make any. But as we all know she is a social butterfly. She is doing good as far as her grades, and homework which is awesome. She dressed up as Freddie Krogers wife/girlfriend. She rocked the outfit. More pictures to come after trick or treating tomorrow.

Renati has adjusted well. She is going to a new in home daycare, recommended by a friend. Of course the kids are all sorts of ages and the ones that are close to hers are no where near her height so she runs the show as always. At this daycare she gets some great benefits, she gets home cooked mexican food all the time, which she LOVES. lol.. She will slowly learn spanish, which if any of you know always asks about people that speak spanish. She will also learn some sign language in the future too. She does get alot of preparing for Kindergarten. She dressed up as a disco girl. She also rocked her outfit.

KJ- Well he will be here on Tuesday YEAHHHH..I have to drive to the LAX airport and pick him up. He has been staying with gma, and going to school and playing football.. His last game is this saturday and then time to start packing buddy. We have been missing him, were very excited for him to come home. I know that Ren could use some extra male support. All this girl power in the house.

Ren- He is adjusting but loves it, he wasn't the best of friends with Utah haha. He is currently working within the same company as me just in another building. Of course he made friends before I did or as he says aquaintances. :) His health is going pretty good in regards to his MS. Which is awesome, he had a scare in the summer time with a minor relapse but now is doing good. He will only progress as the time goes on.

Now Myself- I can say I LOVE my job, I enjoy going to work. The people are great, and the company has taken me in with open arms. It is a huge adjustment from working form home for the last year but well worth it. As crazy as it sounds working with people is something I love to do. Yes I enjoy working in a call center. haha....What can I say I love a challenge and I love change.

Were going to try our hardest to go home in December I don't have a date yet. New to the company but we will try to make it work. I think if we make it twice a year, and make everyone come and say hi a couple times we will do awesome. HINT HINT...:)

One thing I would like to bring up is My Sweet Angel Renasia's Birthday is this coming Thursday Nov. 5th. I want to ask that everyone sends atleast 1 beautiful pink balloon up into the air with her name on it, and her birthdate 11/5/08. If you have a camera and can take a picture even if its with your phone and send them to me I would appreciate it a TON. You can either send them by text 801-641-0754 or email nati_nati4588@hotmail.com- This is definetly a time in life that I never expected to have to deal with or try to get through. But its reality, I can't say it will be a good, bad, or sad day because I really don't know which my emotions will go, or the familes for that matter. When something so tragic happens to a family its very difficult to get through it. I will say this family has learned to cherish every moment you have with everyone you love. Live as if you aren't promised tomorrow. Learn that life is way to short to not enjoy it.
I know I have personally tried to understand everything our family has been through within the last year, I haven't been able to fully help myself understand. But I will say I am very grateful for what I have been given that is positive. I dont' want to say I am grateful for the negative because I have learned from it. But I am grateful were able to learn to love eachother more than before, and appreciate everything everyone does.

Now with all that- I would like to say I appreciate everyones support in this long journey through 2009- There are no words to describe how much I appreciate everyone's help, words, and just prayers to make it through the rough times.

I would like to end with my boss Ryan Romero which some of you might know has recently been diagnosed with CML Lukemia- I have sent the blog to most of you. Anyways, he is the reason I am in Santa Maria, CA so the same time you are saying many prayers for my family if you could add him into those. He is going through his own battles. He is definetly a fighter but he has been there alot for me and my family!

I hope that everyone takes the time to either respond and sign up for a FREE account. Or send us an email with a response letting us know how all of you are doing.

Love and thoughts for everyone!!!

Nati & Family

Marriage

January 20, 2009 & June 6th, 2009

Our family has always had a bond for life. The day we had Ren walk into our life everything changed. We became a real family. On January 20th, 2009 we sealed our family by showing the amount of love we have for eachother. This day has always been the worst day for Ren, and now that I have made it a new begining of a day and something to be happy about! I didn't do it to take away the pain or the sad day. I did it because I love him with all my heart. He has been an inspiration to me. Without him we wouldn't of been complete.

Me, Ren, and the kids have been through life changing experiences not every family has to go through. But we will always have a special bond and the same love in our hearts for eachother!

In this photo we did RENEW our Vows on June 6th, 2009. Our kids wanted to be a part of our Marriage and to be able to put together this day was also special! To have so many friends and family members that care about come and celebrate with you its wonderful.